Perfect Parenting a Myth?

To be strict or not to be.

Every parent has a different way of parenting. Some are strict and some believe in leniency with children. No matter what their beliefs are it all comes down to the fact that all parents want their children to become successful in all aspects of their life. 

Some Parents themselves believe that strictness is not the key for a healthy relationship with children. Moreover, many of such parents feel that they should be their child’s best friend so, that the child learns to share his/her problems and even take on the guidance provided to them by the parents and teachers.

Similarly, people believe children should be treated with love so that they can grow up to have good relationships on the basis of understanding with their own families. 

 

Strict parenting can turn children into liars as they do not feel safe telling the truth, experts have claimed.

Psychotherapist Philippa Perry said: “a child should not be solely to blame for lying, but that the parenting style could have a big impact on their ability and readiness to fib”. 

When a child is raised in a strict way the child would not feel comfortable talking about their own life with the parents hence they might make unreasonable decisions themselves.

With no family time, more hanging out with friends and always wanting to leave the house is what will happen to kids with the strict parents.

Lastly, children who know what is acceptable or appropriate for them to do and what isn’t expected of them they won’t do all the rebellious things, however, if too many boundaries are set the children would want to explore from curiosity and break all the rules. 

A child without limits or boundaries, fails to learn to respect authority at home, in school, jobs, and society in general. Children who get everything they want become ungrateful and undisciplined. If the child is given whatever he wishes for, he will never learn how to deal with strong emotions which he can only learn if he’s sometimes denied of what he wants. 

On the other hand:

“If they don’t think you’re cool, it means you’re probably doing something right. Not only can trying to be cool teach your kids to put a premium on fitting in, but you may simultaneously be losing their respect”

Psych Central reports.

Many parents also think that children who are raised by strict parents are more respectful, intelligent, and level headed. They believe being a strict parent does not have to mean that you’re an abuser. 

Research also shows that parents who are strict with children end up raising children who become successful people. However, the difference between authoritarian and authoritative is what comes into the picture. 

A study published in the 1960’s by the University of California, Berkeley developmental psychologist Diana Baumride found out the three types of parenting:

 

1. Permissive: The parent tries to be accepting of the child.

2. Authoritarian: The parent tries to shape and control the child based on rules and policies which need to be followed.

3. Authoritative: The parent tries to direct the child rationally.

 

 

The authoritative parents are thought to be raising good children with less punishments and strictness but, rather logical explanations to help the child conform. 

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