Saman Beti, I am a seventy year old man and my wife is sixty eight year old.I worked as a clerk in an office for 30 yrs and retired few years back. I worked all my life, put my kids through school, built a small house for my family with my pension money, some loans I took and jewellery my wife sold. All my sons are married now and they each have a room in the house. A year back on the insistence of my son’s and pressure of daughter in laws, I transferred my house to all my three sons name. A few months later their attitude started changing dramatically towards me and their Mother.They became rude, hardly talked to us, seemed extremely irritated and God forbid if one of us get sick they get so mad and irritated as if its our fault. All my daughter in laws cook separately but none want to share their food with us. Even their kids seem hostile and try to avoid us like we are some contagious disease. My wife does not say anything but her big eyes are always filled with silent tears. I keep thinking what did I do so wrong that our kids hate us so much. We don’t interfere in their lives, we never get angry at them but somehow nothing we say or do is good enough. Sometimes when none of our sons offer us lunch or dinner me and my wife quietly go to the road buy peanuts or corn and eat it. When I think about my life I have a lot of regrets. I regret not raising good kids with better values, not saving enough for my old age, trusting my kids to take care of us, failing my wife in her old age. I am crushed, tired and Heart broken of life. Is there anything you think we can do so our kids love us, our grand kids respect us and if they can’t feed us least they do is say two words of love and care. Sometimes I have nightmares that they will kick me and my wife out of our house.
Where will we go then? will we die on streets?
Your confession has made me heartbroken too. The first thing that I want to say to your kids is that I wish you knew what kind of ill fated children you are. I strongly believe that in life what goes around comes around. Karma has a mysterious way of haunting us for our misdeeds .Beware of that time when your own children will be so cruel, selfish and indifferent to you in your old age. You have created Hell for yourself in this Life.
To you sir, I would like to say that you should be proud of yourself. You are a dignified man who worked hard all his life, provided education for his kids, was a responsible father, saved whatever you could manage in your small salary and put a roof over your family’s head. You are a good father, who unconditionally loved and trusted his children and selflessly transferred his only asset, his house, his security for his old age on their name.
In life God sometimes test us with people we love and things we treasure the most. Be strong and positive. You are a dignified man, find out if there is any small business you and your wife can do and respectfully make some money to be financially independent. Also try to sit with your three sons and communicate how you feel and discuss your fears and concerns. Communication is a key to solving any issues if this does not help then you can always call me since you called me “beti’? then contact this beti if things don’t workout. I will take care of you both in sh Allah. I will pray for you .
My respects ,Saman H