Privates on Rent and the Ghost of a Happy Hooker

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Recently, I came across many fabricated stories of “happy hookers” who are glad to trade their bodies for money; either in the name of feminism or liberated females who enjoy a raunchy sex and get paid for, in return.

I could never come to terms with the idea of a happy hooker. How come a woman could be happy for being sold, for being merchandised. It’s not about being pimped or not being pimped. It is about missing the love and respect which is beyond few bucks and few hours of pleasure, torture or violence.

My itch to delve deep into this topic took me to a hooker’s doorsteps with the help of a friend who was her client.

My questions were painful, but her answers were even worse. Being a writer, I need to be honest what I recorded and promised her to deliver the same way:

This interview is the first in the series of three.

First part reflects upon her childhood.

Q1. When you started in this field?

Answer: I was born in it. My grandfather sold my mother into this profession and I am a whore with origins unknown.

My silence grew deeper.

She continued with a frozen expression. I was raised in a house where every day my mother swallowed the scum of a number of men to feed me. She laughed. How ironic, is not it. She asked me. I kept looking at her for her bad luck or for her courage to speak the savage truth.

I had dreams of becoming a woman who could rule the world but ended-up fucking it. I was twelve when my drugged and HIV positive mother pimped me.

My mom’s assistant, lets name him “D”, she interjected, took me to my first man repeatedly letting him know that I was a virgin, it was my first time. I was looking at both of them with a poker face. Not knowing what to expect. He took my hand and handed me over to his smutty scrutiny of my body– body of a twelve year old.

The entire nation is going crazy with Zainab murder & rape case; I was five years older than her when prostituted. But my predators kept me alive to make money out of my body. I am glad, in a way, that the poor child passed away. In other case, she could have been subject to a fate like mine.  And the tragedy is that kids who are prostituted by their own families are never heard or discovered to begin with.

I was ashamed of my existence for a fraction of a second and feared for my life for the rest of evening—an evening which introduced me to a world which I dreaded the most, loathed and despised.

But madam (addressing me), I learnt to respect my mother. I just knew there was no glory, no pleasure in getting stripped in front a stranger for sex.

Silence prevailed for a while. She waited for second question. I resumed my courage in the face of humanity which was unknown to me till this moment. I read many stories, watched so many movies covering this topic, but dealing with the one in reality was a different ball-game altogether.

Q2. You ever wanted to go to school, get educated or do have fun with your friends watching a movie? I mean, what were aspirations as a young girl despite being prostituted?

Answer: To your utter surprise, I never left studies. Graduated from a reputed college of Lahore, made many friends, had fun; but I had a schedule to follow. I had my clients lined-up on certain nights. Madam, whores live off their privates. From college fee to the car I ride, I had to take many rides in between.

Q3. What subjects you studied? 

(I just wanted to deflect from the topic for a while to breathe.)

Answer: Philosophy, Literature and psychology. I am fond of Jaun Elia. How poignantly he comes across to his readers through his verses; simple and crisp. She narrated me a verse from Jaun. Silent for a few minutes and then resumed.

You must be thinking why after graduating from a reputed college, I didn’t stop prostituting. I did, for a while. I started working in a multinational company as an communication officer. But demons of one’s past never leave. And, especially, of a whore, they stick to life. Whores are possessed and demonized. She laughed but I could feel the lump in her throat.

Q4. So, you still work as a prostitute?

Answer: Yes. Like any other whore my vagina and anus both are for rent. Now my mother is old. He rental wages are very low. You know what I mean, madam. So, bottom line is, I have to work for the two of us. Remember, it takes two to tango. In our case (she meant to her mother-daughter relationship), it takes two to survive till the end. One keeps renting the privates if the other is old.

Q5. You ever got impregnated by a client and what about the kids, if any?

Answer: I am 30. And I had my first abortion at the age of 15. You can imagine what sort of life and how many painful moments I had been through. But no kid, so far.

Q6. You ever wanted to be a mother?

Answer: No. Because I was pimped by my mom. I had no desire to rent my womb.

Q7. Is there any relationship or activity which distracts you for while from daily routine?

Answer: I spend time with my true being. My body can be screwed but not my soul. I am a loner and love to stay silent and to read a book.

Interview continued…

P.S.: This is not a news, this is a narrative. Not to pass on but to haunt you with eyes wide open.

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